The wind has blown me to Disneyland, countless times.
Yes, countless times, as I might be a little embarrassed to
count the actual days of my life I have spent at the Disneyland Resort. But some of you may not know that the title of this story are the last words you hear before one gets on
the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad
rollercoaster in Disneyland(or to be technical it is also played at the Magic
Kingdom at Disney World).
After not being in a real bed for longer than usual from
travelling from Hawaii (yes Hawaii) I thought it a brilliant idea to take up my
walking buddy’s offer of walking at 6:00A the next morning, which is technically 3AM Hawaiian time.
(Photo of my walking buddy and me. JK, it’s Pixar’s Joy and
Sadness from the movie “Inside Out”.)
It took a good 15 minutes struggling to find a jog bra, my
Cascade Lakes Relay shirt and the rest of my clothes to make a decent presence
for the neighborhood walk. I then
proceeded to negotiate a 6:25 meeting time.
The song playing in the car- “Good To Be Alive” by Jason Gray. This is a song that is in my mind’s jukebox.
H23. I love the lyrics of this song, which a few years ago I shared a link with
a friend who was in the midst of battling breast cancer and she replied after I
posted on her page, “What a fun presentation! Making this my theme song!”
She
fought the good fight, made this her theme song, but she died three months
later.
But
this day, this Thursday, was the day that my good friend was to get his chemo
for the first time. I know he is living
the theme of that song, and I want him to still be here with us. I wore the Cascade Lakes shirt because I was
running the race when my sister had her first chemo treatment. She finished her
race at 59 years young.
I keep cutting in line to pray for my friend, that he is healed and
stays here with us to continue to remind us to “Hold Fast”.
So
I took the words of the song to heart and began the day.
My
walking buddy (remember the previous photo) and I did our catching up on our
walk, and did something we hadn’t done before. I asked her if we could pray for
our friend when we were done walking, and she said we could just do it then.
Interestingly,
I have never prayed out loud whilst walking, at least I cannot recollect this.
It was so, well, bizarre. It felt like I was walking with my eyes closed. (You
may ask, “Why is this relevant to the story?” Well, it is it was just that kind
of day. Trusting what God has planned for your day is a bit like walking with
your eyes shut, trusting what He has set before you-eyes open or shut).
At
the conclusion of our walk we talked a bit about not seeing each other for a while
as I would be going Wildhorse Canyon for YoungLives Camp on Sunday morning.
When
I made it home I saw that I had a text message on my phone from one of my
YoungLives team member, to call her ASAP. She uses capitals A LOT so I wasn’t
too concerned, but I called her right away, even thought it was seven something
in the morning, which apparently yesterday, all time was irrelevant.
She
asked how I was doing, and such and I said I was gearing up to pack for camp.
Then she said we weren’t going to camp. I was a little confused. I was
listening and thought maybe I was somehow axed from the list because we had too
many leaders for our area, or that maybe we didn’t raise enough money…
But
this was the problem :
Apparently, the camp is currently shut down due to this
ball of no fun, the Norovirus.
So my YoungLives leader friends and Young Life staff, and
everybody and their dog are trying to make this camp happen (background story
that is running behind the scenes while I do other stuff. The stuff that I do.
Whatever it is that is I do).
My day was to be reserved for packing and running errands
to get ready for me leaving for camp.
So I did what I most always do every day with the attitude
of “Let’s see where the wind blows me today.”
Sure enough, I found myself helping charge a car battery
for one of my Hosea friends, which occupied a good portion of my day helping to
solve the issue of a dead van battery.
Then I was onto helping another Hosea friend who needed a
ride to the grocery to get her WIC food, as she owns no car. While in the
grocery store, I found myself thinking, “This is so funny that I actually LIKE
doing stuff like this.”
The day progressed, battery problem sort of solved until
the first of the month, and the YoungLives camp solution was being worked out
in the background. The day ticked into the evening, then I sat with my husband
and discussed the day(the daughter made dinner whilst I was out and about). Then I realized we needed to get onto the production part of hosting a house concert
in about three weeks-a concert at our house with a “real” folk artist, icon if
I must say.
No, it is not Daft Punk, but an amazing singer songwriter,
folksy guy from Alabama. Pierce
Pettis is his name, and my favorite song he wrote is “God Believes In You”. Why yes, I will share all the lyrics of the song:
When you start to doubt that you exist
God believes in you
Confounded by the evidence
God believes in you
When your light burns so dim
When your chances seem so slim
And you swear you don't believe in him
God believes in you
When you rise up just to fall again
God believes in you
Deserted by your closest friends
God believes in you
When you're betrayed with a kiss
You turn your cheek to another fist
It dose not have to end like this
God believes in you
Oh, everything matters
If anything matters at all
Everything matters
No matter how big, no matter how small
Oh, God believes in you
God believes in you
When you're so ashamed that you could die
God believes in you
And you can't do right even though you try
God believes in you
Blessed are the ones who grieve
The ones who mourn, the ones who bleed
In sorrow you sow but in joy you reap
God believes in you
My friend, who’s
husband started chemo in the morning, is the one who introduced this song to
me. I can still picture us sitting in the car, listening to this song. What a
story God weaves.
So Paul and I just
started getting into the planning of the house concert when my daughter asked me
to go to a movie, Disney/Pixar’s “Inside
Out”. She texted, “I heard it is a Nancy
movie.”
We determined after
the movie, that it was like being in my head.
Without giving away
all of the plot and my interpretation of what happens in the movie, I will say
that Disney/Pixar’s solution to the problems of life differ from my
perspective. I do not believe a wagon fueled by song will launch us to the
moon. Imagination, escapism, romantisim, pragmatism, sarcasm or a thousand trips to Disneyland will not
solve the problems that we have.
The movie’s plot and thoughts around this theme and the dilemma I had with their solution
bounced around in my head kinda like heffalumps
and woozles all night until
I woke up, with this thought,
“Only the
Truth of His Love and Grace can save us from ourselves.”
Nothing romantic or warm fuzzies about an innocent man dying on a
cross in my place. The story of the cross that is told is the Truth that I
believe. That is the truth with the big T. My broken soul and body is on a
train ride to something, and someplace better, lighter, more loving with a
capital L. No more tears. No more death. No more fake love, only His Real
Love.
So I ride this daily train with the problems, evil, sin,
etc., believing, knowing that He has the master plan/design that appears
flawed to us, but is wonderfully made. Buckle up.
*My last published blog was about my friend/brother that I mentioned above. I don't need to read it again. I know that he is even a better man that he was four years ago.
